The Sea is Such a Troll

Lux edged toward the center of the tree, only for another strange event to occur. His eyes widened for nearly the hundredth time that day. Little hairs on the back of his neck stood up. Vorpal began growling. Lux slowly lifted a hand to Vorpal's mouth.

"Shhhh...." He whispered, still staring at the guy in front of him. Weird. Not. The weirdest thing he'd seen that day. But definitely weird. Agh, those EYES. Lux began to feel a little bit haunted, but he would not dare hug a tree in front of people, be they only partial people or otherwise. Lux eyed the hair.

The hair.

"So like. Is that natural?"

Obviously this kid's parents didn't teach him the right response to his impedending doom. He was supposed to beg for mercy or some other spineless crap, not try to make a conversation. About hair! What. The. Hell. Kane had half a mind to just kick him off his high horse--ehem, branch--and be done with this idiot. But at the same time. . .the punk had kind of stolen the spotlight. He snatched a fistful of hair, leaning forward with a tut, tut, tut. "I could ask the same of you," he snorted.

"Where did he go?" Vi thought aloud, craning to look around her. "Fleur, help me out," she ordered, "Use them Poké-senses of yours." She huffed, snaking onto her Trainer's head. Her sharp eyes caught the flicker of a shadow overhead, the idea of a bird of prey about to swoop down sending her on edge. She tensed and looked up, expecting something like an Unfeazant or a Braviary. Not. . .that. "You see something?" she whispered, following her Pokémon's gaze.

WHAT THE FUCK DID I WALK INTO?!

"Oh, I said that aloud, didn't I?" she muttered. One of the people moved and peered down at her. She blanched, breaking out into a little sweat. "I was never here! Go back to what you were doing!" she yelled, skittering backwards. Which, from down here, looked like some macking out. Yep, that's right.

Lux and Kane sitting in tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.

Wow. This guy. Was really close to his face- Oh! Lux's voice proceeded to trail into the higher octives upon the hair snatching. "U-hm...!" He coughed, and Vorpal began to growl again. "Shhh! Vorpal! He'll EAT you!" Lux snapped, only half joking. And- Oh, god. Of all people to walk in on a situation like this. Now people were definitely going to talk. 'Guess it started with a whisper. Damn.

"Yeah, my hair's naturally screwy... Would you like to know what kind of shampoo I use while we're at it?" Lux replied, voice heading toward the lighter tones.

Kane smirked at the little Water Pokémon, amused by his attempt to scare him off. "In all honesty, my hands could eat you with a side of nails." Actually, his hand was nibbling on that handful of hair. Then some god awful shriek from below dampened his mood. He let go and glared down at the girl with the Snivy on her head. She panicked and stumbled back, going on about never being here. Apparently she didn't care about her acquaintance, wanting to save her own skin over his. Ah, human nature at its rawest. Self-preservation always revealed the animalistic side of humans. He snickered, turning back to the boy in the tree. "Nah. How about instead we play a little game?" He grinned deviously, teasing, "Let's see if you can sprout wings and fly." Judging from everything's that happened, it wouldn't be surprising. But those wings better hurry and come in, cause Kane's foot struck out for the dead center of Lux's chest.

"What are you doing...?" Lux mumbled before very suddenly he was kicked. "HAcH!" The noise was thumped out of his chest as the pain prickled icily in his sternum before radiating out along the rest of his ribs, now an icy cold cage around his internal organs. His gray eyes clouded as a strand of saliva was forced from his mouth upon impact with the tree. Cold cracked along his shoulder blades like a chilled egg, eyes seeing nothing but spots before he... Fell sideways.

Ohsnap- That was close. Branch. Yep. Mhm. Perfect. Absolutely lovely. Wait. The weight on his shoulder was gone. Where was Vorpal? WHERE. WAS HE?

"Vorpal... Vorpal?!"

Vorpal shrieked as Lux was kicked against the tree. Stupid useless paws... He thought as he lost his grip and fell. Well, it was a long way down. There were branches, but he was too limited in arm or leg range every time he passed one. Vorpal was beginning to feel very pissed.

"OSHAA!" His fur began to pulsate with energy, and then began to light.

Ah, the pain in his eyes was quite lovely. He sweetly barred his teeth as the blue-haired boy about blacked out, losing his balance and tipping sideways. But like you wouldn't expect, he grew more excited when he grabbed the branch. "My, my," he taunted, "Don't you have the will to live?" He crouched down, looking the hanging boy straight in the eyes. "Well how about we see how strong it truly is?" he sneered. He straightened up, looking down with glee. He lifted a foot, leaving it hovering there for dramatic effect. "Say hello to your not-so-lucky Pokémon for me, hmm?"

"Agh..." Lux groaned before coming back to his senses. He was definitely going to feel everything the next day. That is, if he was going to make it. But of course he was going to make it. Duh. I mean, come on. Lux looked into the eyes of the beast and saw nothing, even with that sick grin on his face. Frowning, Lux attempted to feel for another branch, but sadly there was none. He sighed.

"You didn't answer my question."

"OSHAAAAAAAAAAAAADWOTTT!" The glowing mass screamed before twisting in the air with the skill of an acrobat, using his scalchops to sever a branch. 'Pocketing' the scalchops, Vorpal caught the branch in his elongated forepaws which were beginning to lose their white glow. Vorpal, fighting the wind, lowered the banch, keeping an eye on another branch that was coming up at him on his rushing journey toward the ground. If he didn't do this perfectly, well... It might hurt.

There was a second of hesitation, a puzzled look flashing across Kane's face. Seriously? Humans are so incompetent! It's like he had to have the last laugh! Pfft, like he actually would. Guess who'd be laughing when he was six feet under? That's right! Not him! Why? Cause he'd be dead! Man, he's so stupid he's making my IQ drop by the second. Unless. . .That was his plan all along! He's so idiotic he's a criminal mastermind! And someone's train of thought just crashed violently. With an irritated huffed, he brought his foot down on the twerp's face.

"Is-" FACEFOOT. Damn. Looks like he'd never get to finish that sentence. Okay. Ow. Seriously effing ow. Lux finally lost his grip due to the blow, and was now falling, the blood from his nose sprinkling the branch he'd just let go of. He really couldn't see anymore. Couldn't really feel anymore, either.

The branch collided with the branch below, and with lightning speed, the Dewott jumped on the end he'd just been holding, causing the stick to catapult him back into the air. His feet came into contact with the branches, and he was on his way to the demon. Listen up, listen up, there's a devil in the church...

Vorpal removed his scalchops and leaped upon the head of the gene-spliced horror for just a split second, but managed to crack the scalchops down on his skull before leaping down to go for Lux. Ah, yes, this body was so much better than that dinky little stubby body. So much more speed and agility. And ARMS. Lovely. Vorpal cringed upon seeing the face of the falling human; covered in blood, which appeared to be streaming from his nose. Using the scalchops in an X-Scissor-like manner (god, he loved those things), he severed the branches from the tree they were having all their fun in and the branches of the next tree so that the branches fell, dipping in the shape of a V, getting caught in the other branches and linking together, catching Lux. What a frickin' relief.

A sharp-tooth grin followed the doomed boy and his trail of blood. But this moment of sadistic happiness blinded him from the incoming missile. The now Dewott's scalchops slammed onto his head, almost knocking him off his percarious perch. He let out a primordial roar, the bloodlust in his demonic eyes. With the deadly instincts of a hunter he dropped off the branch. He landed on the makeshift nest, breaking apart its flimsy structure. While the unconcious boy plummeted Kane stayed afloat thanks to the trendils on his back. Where's your wings now? He fixtated his angry glare onto the Water Pokémon, a growl rumbling in his throat. He thrusted a hand forward, the face upon his palm showing. A shockwave of energy erupted from the mouth, the Dragon Pulse heading straight for Vorpal.

Down below, a girl watched in horror as things went from bad to shit. The Snivy on her head leapt powerfully away, spinning like a midair top. Leaves twirled out into a cyclone below her, acting as the reaction for the Third Law of Motion. She rose on the column of air stirred and trapped in the vortex. Lux's body fell to her and she grabbed him with her vines. The force he carried over to her pushed her into the funnel of the tornado, the air acting as a cushion for their velocity. She gently landed on the forest floor, setting Lux down before setting her eyes upon the showdown above. I just have to save all the idiots, don't I? Her vines wrapped around the ends of two branches and pulled them back. She braced herself as she bended the limbs towards her, her vines shaking at how taunt she had them. She narrowed her slitted eyes and hopped, barely making it off the ground before getting slung. The tension catapulted her like a rocket towards her targeted destination.

From below rose Fleur with the grace and prowness like that an avenging angel. A shining light burst to life in her paws, the rays of a blinding flash swallowing up the atmosphere around them. A vine snaked around the Dewott's torso, tethering the two Pokémon together. She shifted her direction, pulling Vorpal with her. Her other vine shot onto a branch below, retracting to send their momentum onto a curved path. At the peak of the swing she let go, suspending them in the air just long enough to snag onto another branch. It was a timed art, using the mechanics of a pendelum to keep the speed of their descent at a safe rate. Then with the last swing they touched down no where close to being harmed.

"Snivy."

Lux was. Yep. Totally. Blacked. Out. Like, the probability that this boy was so completely out of it was definitely one hundred percent, if not two hundred. So anyway, Lux was out and definitely bleeding heavily from the face. It looked as if this one definitely needed some medical help; we could all agree on that one. Oh, and something could possibly be done about that bleeding! Tick tock, time is dead kids- Okay, so now that the narrator is done with stealing inside jokes from a particular infectious webcomic, it’s time to visit the other victim. But just one more joke… Please? Alright,“Hey, we just met you, and this is crazy, but I’m kinda dying, so save me maybe?”
All right, so now that we are done with the ridiculous filler jokes, it is time to turn our attention to Vorpal, who was currently being saved by his knight of glossily bright leaves. Whether he appreciated this act remains to be seen. Now. Vorpal was plucked right off the branch by vines, resulting in a cry of surprise. He resisted the urge to facepalm; he’d clearly had this situation under control, but really deep down, and not even far down, in fact it was complete reality smacking him in the face (and it did not need assistance), he knew that he now had nothing under control. The Woman was in. And saving everyone’s arse. Vorpal still couldn’t help but cross his arms upon touching the ground. The vines unwrapped him.

“D’wott.” He mumbled, saluting. Now, just what, exactly, did that translate to? Yes, we can translate Pokemon language because we’re just that legit. “Yeah, thanks I suppose, but really I think I was doing fine, up until the point at which you had to save me of course and then that led to now so thank you and whatnot.”
WAIT. Did that little Pokemon noise REALLY translate to all that…?

…

SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY!

So you know, shifting the spotlight off the Pokémon and back to the people. Vi was feeling more in charge of the situation now that Fleur's boss actions pulled her back to reality. Which is odd because most sweet action scenes are reserved for the movies, not real life. Now back at the reins she put them escape artist skills to the test. She hefted the bloody boy over her shoulder like he was a sack. He fell out of a tree, what could a little rough handling do to him? Her eyes flickered up to the sky, getting her bearings in order. Judging by the time and position of the sun she pinpointed north's direction. North being Accumula Town and the hospital. There was just one thing standing between her and sweet freedom.

The demon.

He dropped to the ground, a psychotic grin spread across his face. "Where do you think you're going?" he asked, sickly sweet poison laced in his words.

"Oh, you know," she said dismissively, "Just stealing your boyfriend."

Talk about subtle.

Vi didn't give Kane the chance to figure out where the Hell that had come from. "Fleur!" she yelled, passing on the order almost wordlessly. Her small Pokémon launched into the air, leaves already springing forth. He grinned, holding a hand out to parry whatever the Snivy was going to throw at him. But arrogance is the downfall of everyone.

Leaves were flying through the air in a whirlwind, but for a different purpose than normal. She let her control loose, flipping upside down immerse herself in the tornado. There was a spark and nature's strobe light was born. Pinpoints of darkness flashed across searing light faster than someone could blink. In all honesty, it was a strobe light on crack. She sped back up, regaining command of her twister. She pumped out more leaves but now from the bottom, the two forces clashing. The whole structure bowed and collasped, the torrent of leaves a chaotic cloud. Fleur shot out from under it, zipping after her Trainer who had slipped away like a ninja.

Their problem was left behind them, rubbing his eyes furiously and trying to hear anything past the intense noise of rustling leaves. In due time he recovered, but they were out of sight by then. He took a deep breath, the noise a strangled growl in his throat. Those punks had gotten the better of him and left him on the brink of a massacre. There was only one thing holding him back. He inhaled again, this time clinging to a mingle of certain scents. His scowl melted into a wolfish grin when he realized the game wasn't over.

"That's right, lead me straight to my quarry."

Someone needed to lose a few pounds. "Next time you decide to get knocked out," Vi wheezed, "I'm not carrying your fat butt." Running away from a psycho with a hundred-something deadweight over your shoulder will definitely tire you out. She huffed, "Any signs of him, Fleur?" She looked back, her Snivy merely shaking her head. "I hope we lost him for good, but I have a feeling he'll be back." And those nagging feelings were always the ones to look out for. She shuddered and tried to pick up the pace, wanting as much distance between them and him.

Her blue eyes bugged when she heard the soft flapping of wings behind her. She was about to drop the boy and run--hey, self-perservation--when she heard a cheerful voice. "Oh, it's you," she sighed with relief, glad it was the other half-Pokémon freak. She snorted at the question, wondering if she was too daft to realize she had an unconscious body draped over her shoulder. "Oh, Lux's man crush showed up and pushed him out a tree. But no biggie. He's just bleeding heavily from the face and knocked the fuck out."

Vi cringed as she felt something slimy dribbling down her back. I swear, if he bloodies up my shirt. . . She blew a strand of blonde hair away from her face, but it remained stuck to the sheen of perspiration on her forehead. Just great. Suddenly, something tapped her and she felt reinvigorated. The load on her shoulder eased up considerably, almost like it was a small child. "Thanks," she said, quickening her gait now that she actually could. She pursed her lips, a thought occurring to her. "Pfft, maybe you should have just jumpstarted him," she huffed jokingly, "Make him carry his own lazy butt." Don't know if that would have ended well. Might burst his skull and spew brain matter everywhere. Heh. She pretty much just followed after the strange girl. She was going roughly north, and that was on track by Vi's standards. It'd still be a while before they reached Accumula, even if they went at a constant rate. That poor, clonked out boy.

OOC: THERE. WE'RE DONE WITH THIS TOPIC.